Dear Mr. Dove-
PLEASE fly elsewhere to find a girlfriend. You've been sitting on top of my roof for almost 2 months now cooing straight into my chimney 14 of 24 hours day after day after day after day. At first I didn't mind your echoing love song, I even thought you were an owl with your misleading "Whoo, whooo," but you're just an ordinary dove looking for love on top of my chimney. Though a very tolerant and non-violent person, my sanity is beginning to be challenged. I recently told my husband out of frustration that if you didn't leave I might come home one day with a fatal weapon. Being the bird lover he is he talked me into a less violent solution. So if you don't want to be scared out of your silly mind by a fake Home Depot owl, you might want to consider taking your love interests elsewhere. I know you appreciate our quaint little neighborhood, but the neighbors are starting to complain. A park, VERY FAR AWAY from my chimney would be a lovely home for you. Clearly there aren't any available female doves in this part of the neighborhood or you would have found her by now. Goodbye Mr. Dove, please, PLEASE, fly AWAY!!!
Sincerely,
Your Frustrated Out-of-Her-Mind Neighbor down the Chimney
Here are some pictures from our trip to our roof to find that, ahem, darn bird:
Picture 1: A view from atop of our neighborhood
Picture 2: Me...in a skirt...on top of the roof (not a good idea).
Picture 3: Our lovely skylight my extremely talented father-in-law installed, I'd never seen it this close before!
Picture 2: Me...in a skirt...on top of the roof (not a good idea).
Picture 3: Our lovely skylight my extremely talented father-in-law installed, I'd never seen it this close before!
P.S. Weeknight Favorite Recipes are now posted at E's Recipe Corner
6 comments:
I love the recipes. I am going to try some.
Ohmygoodnesslaura, what in the heck are you doing on your roof with that skirt on? And, please Laura, cuss words (even mild ones) are used for very special situations, feel free to let it out. This annoying bird deserves a curse word. (of the mild variety.)
too funny. i'm so proud of you for even trying to get on your roof, i could never be brave enough. hope the blasted dove stays away.
That's funny that the bird would stay up there so long. I don't know much about doves, but how weird. Maybe he needs therapy. Our neighbors down the street have a duck on a nest of eggs in their bushes. It's cute.
You're CRAZY!! You're in a skirt and slip on shoes!! I'm not brave enough to go up there w/ secure shoes and pants.
I have a wrist rocket if you want to shoot rocks at it. (I am of the slightly violent defenitely intolerable group.) :-)
Crystal- I know, what was I thinking? It's one thing to flash the whole neighborhood, but slip-on shoes?? It's like I was just asking to fall off. Could I please borrow your wrist rocket? I'm sure with a few tries I could get it!
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